Asking for help

As Q1 winds down and the days between me and my Marketing final tick away, I've thought a lot about what has made these first few weeks at Darden so tough. Some of these things (panic over a new identity, lack of adequate sleep and nutrition, etc.) I've already touched on. But here's a big one I've been pondering lately ... the need to ask for help.

Like many of my classmates, I arrived here in Charlottesville completely comfortable (and accustomed to) blazing my own trail and taking care of myself along the way. If I had a problem, I dealt with it and then reveled in that satisfying feeling of self-sufficiency. It sounds extreme, but I hated --almost viscerally-- having to reach out and ask for help. Rightly or wrongly (wrongly as it turned out), I equated help with weakness, and worse, reliance.

Hah. It took less than a week of classes to realize my previous go-it-alone style would leave me ill-equipped to deal with the rigors of Darden. Here, where I had cases to prepare, spreadsheets to build and accounting metrics to learn, I was out of my element and overwhelmed. If I didn't learn to rely on my peers, on my learning team and on my new friends, I simply wouldn't make it.

Since then, I've made a concerted effort to ask for help. Perhaps this sounds natural, even easy, but for someone who prides herself on her independence and grit, it's taken some getting used to. In reaching out to people and relying on them, I've had to confront the long-held belief that I could do everything --and anything-- entirely on my own. As I continue to come to grips with the fact that I can't and really, shouldn't, I've found that I'm learning more; that people are a lot more receptive to my questions than I thought they would be; and that maybe, just maybe, it's not so bad to show a little weakness now and then.